Tag Archives: Family Therapy

Building a Solid, Stable Life: Community (Part 2)

The storms of life test the quality of the house we’ve built for ourselves. If we’ve built well, we will be kept safe in the storm; if not, we’ll find ourselves with a leaky roof and water in our basement, … Continue reading

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Can We Make Sense of Dating and Mating?

Once upon a time, getting married was easy. Your parents chose your mate for you, you had little or no say in the matter, and you got what you got. If you were lucky or blessed, it was a good … Continue reading

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Couple Therapy, Part 1: The Lifeboat and the Lifeguard

The beginning of the year is a great time to start or restart therapy with your partner, to pursue new perspectives and new skills for your love relationship. To this end I offer you a story, “The Lifeboat.” Once upon … Continue reading

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Therapy and “The Gift of the Magi”

“One dollar and eighty-seven cents. That was all. And sixty cents of it was in pennies.” In his classic Christmas short story The Gift of the Magi, O. Henry paints a picture of a young married couple making their passage … Continue reading

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Is It Thanksgiving Or “Thanks-Giving”?

At this time of the year, if we listen carefully, we can hear the Spirit of Thanksgiving calling to us, “Remember … remember.” That’s what the practice of “thanks-giving” is – the conscious remembering of undeserved benefits we’ve received. This … Continue reading

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Surviving and Thriving in the “Happy Holidays”

The greeting “Happy Holidays!” carries with it the expectation of joy, celebration and happy times. Yet our actual experience of the holiday season is sometimes the opposite. The joyful experience that the holiday season is meant to be can be … Continue reading

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How Do You Know If You’re a Grown-Up?

Starting at the age of 9 or 10, children begin wanting to be grown-ups. They want to experience grown-up perks and prerogatives such as: Staying up late Having money to buy things Eating ice cream whenever they want Driving a … Continue reading

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Addiction and Recovery (Part 4) – Co-Dependence

For a family member or friend of an alcoholic or addict, life can feel like a non-stop roller coaster ride. When we are emotionally attached to someone whose life has been rendered unmanageable by addiction, our own life can become … Continue reading

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Addiction and Recovery Part 3: “By Any Means Necessary”

First published in 1939, Alcoholics Anonymous (the book from which the Twelve Step fellowship got its name) says that alcoholism and other addictions are “cunning, baffling, powerful.” Because of the Hydra-headed nature of addiction, treatment for it and recovery from … Continue reading

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Creating Community Part 1: Show Up and Speak Up

Imagine if, when we left our homes tomorrow morning, every one of us saw our secret thoughts and feelings spelled out in neon lights above our heads. Would we be horrified? Would we rush to throw a blanket over our … Continue reading

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